It could be more it could be less it could be another year. This is now a tradition old enough to vote. But it can’t. But you can read it.
-Ridiculous little furballs
-Begrudgement flowing into bewilderment.
-Sick cycads (sic).
-Zombie fiction that does not glorify or dramatize the danger of a slow-moving insensate human that cannot plan, use tools, coordinate, or stop actively decomposing.
-Moose cavalry.
-Grocureties.
-Not quite the same thing as grocertainties.
-Animatronics with ambitions that do not exceed their grasp.
-Battlecutlery.
-Squid outfitted with cybernetic endoskeletons.
-Piptato chops.
-A nice fresh leaf on a tree that’s reached full-size but remains still softer to the touch than finest silk.
-Little flashing lights on meters that go up and down and up.
-Sabre teeth.
-Aggressively large and monstrous versions of very harmless creatures, like the boreal gigadee or the star-nosed moleadon.
-Petite, pocket-portable pétanque pieces playing for petty prizes (pennies)..
-The mechanically-intricate intersection between chapstick and chopstick.
-Sabre claws.
-Simmering.
-In food. In person, it’s a sign of something going wrong.
-Trees that have replaced the trunk with the tank.
-Rugged, climbable slopes with rough surfaces optimized for easy traction.
-Sabre eyebrows.
-Blueberry crisp.
-Animals that seem to be trying to be other animals but with several extra plot twists.
-Rubble-rousing.
-Benevolent bennettitaleans.
-Hand-tooled craftsmanship outside the genus Homo.
-Ecosystems that are a few 90 degree turns from how you’d assume they’d be.
-Trading sour grapes for sour cream.
-And onion.
-An adjustable-grip Philips-headed curmudgeon.
-Glassware symphonies that end in a gigantic crashcendo.
-Living inside shells. The bigger the better.
-The crevices between the obvious.
-Croutons beyond the scope of grain products.
-Tangled and tattered treeships, pulling into harbour with a fresh load of fruit.
-World unbuilding.
-The overturning of the concept of monarchy holding any form of merit.
-Cleanliness taking its rightful place as reigning far above godliness.
-Humungous-ass horsetails.
-Rose upon rows.
-Clambering.
-Emergent seas.
-Sports on skates that shouldn’t be so.
-Rapscallions, rockscallions, popscallions, and folkscallions.
-Cloning dinosaurs rag-tag.
-Shin boards and heel drives, so ankle monitors may have purpose at last.
-Extremely and excitingly confused evolutionary histories.
-The many and equally-silly relatives of the raccoon.
-Sapience popping up in unexpected places.
-Extra pasta.
-Rising floods that have absolutely no waters involved.
-Industrial geysers.
-A fair well, regarded fondly.
-Excessive clanging noises, if not protracted
-Ridiculous and impractical weaponry that was never used to harm a single soul.
-Trick tack toe – ow.
-Unreasonably big versions of very small things.
-Exhaustiveness that energizes.
-Peering from high vantage points.
-Particularly if you can see an even higher one nearby.
-The slow and inevitable evolution of any chair into a comfy chair.
-Waves that wave back when waved at.
-Tortoise sorcery.
-Oils and vinegars.
-Crabapples, crabpears, crabberries, crabmentines, and the many other and varied fruit of the crabpocalypse.
-Triple-jointedness.
-Submarines, supermarines, and the complex and confusing moment found betwixt them.
-Deep roots beneath a short stem and a jaunty little leaf.
-A rankle in time.
-Marine massiveness.
-People.
-Reptiles.
-People that are also reptiles.
-Reptiles that are also people.
-Circumnerdvigation of the globe.
-Fearsome mythological beasts that breathe oxygen and exhale a deadly torrent of carbon dioxide
-Beauteousness that turns to hideousness under closer examination that then wraps back around repeatedly.
-Free-swimming free-living free-loving plankton.
-Capacious carapaces. With casemates.
-That little face cats make when they want you to rub their bellies and truly mean it.
-The expansions of the alphabet beyond the shackles of the traditional 26 letters, as demanded by Mr. Seuss in his landmark political tract: On Beyond Zebra.
-Scrumptiousness of the inanimate.
-Archwizsaurs.