Apéritif: red Flamburr, aged in a forty-year furnace, curdled in the hate of myriad scorpions and chilled with glacier hearts.
Appetizer: ground-bone bread, newly formed from the freshest fruit of the Carrion-King’s gallows and married to a dark, troubled stormbran dough. Jams and mustards are provided from a wide variety of innards and traitors.
Soup: a rich Bnos-style cream, thickened with marrow from the gallows and lashed with a full brace of grave-onions.
Main Course: Every unfibrous muscle in a Manglefoot’s body, pulverized with tremendous force and braided into a sinewsage over forty feet in length along with the monster’s spinal cord and small intestines. Served rare.
Salad: clotted tumbleweed hearts from the ghostland of the east, where every inhabitant was buried alive, dressed with a thick pint of drakkblood, sweetened in the innarsyrups of gentle everbees.
Assassination: a tangy cyanide/cyanide-like capsule concealed inside one of the tumbleweed hearts by a furtive, cunning, yet fruitless hope. Clears the palate, provides a light buzz.
Cheese: Gorbeg’s own Griffon Green, aged in the Red Caves under the Blue Mountain in the Black Highlands of the Whitemarches. Includes the still-meandering beetles that are crucial to its fermentation. Served with a plate of ladyfingers, gentlefingers, and childfingers of all types.
Fallback Assassination: six inches of cold keenfolk-gleaned steel to the brisket, delivered two-handed by the waiter to the brisket.
Impromptu Snack: the crushed and mangled remains of the waiter, garnished with much chuckling and delight.
Dessert: desert sands from Tir; shaved ice from Altanorici; cold basalt from the flowfields of Burner’s Eye; all boiled to a scream and frozen into edible glass surrounding the chilled organs of an adorable yet delicious creature of unidentified species. Consumers may guess the dessert’s identity for a prize.
Digestif: Deep dark Glou, soused in its own luminescence and infused with hatred by a Longwhorl master-fumer. Topped with a single marbled-over Salaman’s Grape the size of a golf ball.
Unplanned After-Dinner Treat: the marbled-over Salaman’s Grape three more times (up and down and back again) accompanied with violent coughing, followed by six feet of the Carrion-King’s own esophagus, backwards. Garnished with fatal lack of oxygen to the brain.